Buzz Lightyear, Handgun, and a Cassette snugly inside a fanny pack.

A group of physicians has just released the coffee table book to end all coffee table books. Stuck Up!: 100 Objects Inserted and Ingested in Places They Shouldn’t Be is a collection of 100 X-ray images showing foreign objects ingested or inserted into human bodies, “accidentally” or on purpose.

The photos are accompanied by deep commentary:

Patients who suffer from the problem of having a bottle stuck up their rear are often not honest about what happened. Here are some examples:
PATIENT A: Doc, I was vacuuming in the nude, and I fell. It was a million-to-one shot, Doc, a million-to-one.
PATIENT B: My hands were full.
PATIENT C: I swore this would never happen again. This time I made sure to put a string in the bottle and closed the cap. When I pulled the string, there was nothing on the other end.

 

“Most commonly we do see long slender objects because that is the most form fitting,” says the author but his favorite stowaways are action figures like Buzz Lightyear, who goes to infinity and beyond!

The doctors hope the book will remove some of the embarrassment and encourage people to seek treatment, but the idea that your X-rays might end up in a book could be an even bigger pain in the butt.