The Air Sex World Championships are coming to a city near you. The competition is stiff but only figuratively. Just like air guitar, participants must simulate the act.
“Unlike air guitar, there are not many other rules,” explains the website. “Props are allowed, groups are allowed. The only important rule is that all sexual climaxes must be simulated, not real, and you must have at least one invisible person (or object) that you are making love to.”
“Air sex will be an Olympic sport one day,” the show’s founder and MC, Chris Trew, told The Huffington Post. “We’re giving these people a platform to [expletive] to glory. They’re getting a stab at stardom.”
Trew recently tried his act out on America’s Got Talent but was quickly voted off by Howard Stern, who found it “highly offensive.”
“Clearly I was robbed and Howard Stern should be ashamed of himself for keeping me out of Las Vegas,” said Trew. “I will get my revenge and prove to the world that the Air Sex Championships is a legit sport. I am not mad at Sharon Osbourne, she is a weird Canadian with shitty taste. Howie Mandel was nice to me. Howard Stern screwed me.”