Absolutely, just ask 50 year-old virgin Pastor Dave (video right). True enough, we live in a over-sexed instant gratification world but was it not God himself who said ‘go forth and bump uglies.’ In addition to Godtube’s sex embargo, violence and profanity are also big no-nos. Again this is totally contradictory to the Bible. Remember a little someone by the name of Jesus. He was quite the rabble rouser himself:

Remember when Superman stood for truth, justice, and all that stuff. Well apparently he doesn’t. Ever since he turned a blind eye to lobotomizing of super villains (see: Identity Crisis) it’s been a downward spiral for the big guy even Superboy and Superman’s double saw it, granted they responded a little excessively (i.e., tried to destroy the universe). Once again Superman is taking a not-so-subtle turn for the worse. Superman

PASTE MAGAZINE is a monthly music mag that covers adult-album-alternative (Triple A), Americana and indie rock, each issue includes a full-length sampler CD (20 tracks). And it’s yours, all 11 issues for a buck. Technically, the offer is name your own price but you can go as low as one dollar. However, if you can afford to be generous, why not be. After all, this is quality stuff here, voted

Not since bastardization of Godzilla has Hollywood so thoroughly pissed off fans! No longer is G.I. JOE A REAL AMERICAN HERO, they’re a European-based military unit known as Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity (G.I.J.O.E.). Paramount Pictures is updating (selling out) G.I. JOE for the new live action movie because of fears that A REAL AMERICAN HERO will be a tough sell. You may be surprised to know that the un-Americanization

There’s never a bad time for slutty zombies but on Halloween this is definitely required viewing. These are 2 music videos from the Swedish disco house band NAKED APE. You can read more about them at http://www.nakedape.se/ & http://www.myspace.com/nakedapesweden. The first video proves zombies can do it all night long–wash cars that is. The second is more intense and features a zombie pole dance. ‘Nuff said

This Halloween corporate America cashed in big on Paris Hilton’s short stint in jail with her very own costume. And I’ll give them this, the costume is as authentic as it is trashy, it even comes with a false sense of entitlement. But it got me thinking just who’s this costume for? Paris Hilton’s fans are mostly… well they’re mostly older men but except for the random oddball (pictured right),

Starting today Lame News will be giving money away. You heard right–FREE MONEY! This contest is partly to reward regular readers and partly to increase readership. And it’s very simple. On the sidebar of this blog you will see a clue word–WRITE IT DOWN! Eventually a new clue word will replace the old one and etcetera. These words spell out a movie quote (so you’ll need to visit regularly to

How could you Hollywood? How could take a classic cartoon like Alvin and the Chipmunks and turn into crap– literally. The trailer (video below) actually shows Alvin eating Theodore’s crap. First of all, there’s nothing funny about eating crap. Secondly, the whole point of trailer is entice people to go see it by showing its best parts. I’d shudder to think what the runner up for the trailer was. And

All it took was one innocent question from a little girl, “will Dumbledore ever find true love?” And presto chango Dumbledore was transmogrified into a gay. Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling vehemently defended the revelation, saying it’s her book and her right to say what it is. And she’s absolutely right but she’s also absolutely wrong. Imagine Sylvester Stallone came out tomorrow and announced Rocky was a white supremacist. Kinda

pay no attention to the woman behind the curtain No it’s not the latest in Halloween costumes. It’s called urban camouflage and it’s quite possibly the funniest thing ever. The mentally challenged brainchild of designer Aya Tsukioka, urban camouflage gracefully conceals the wearer from would be assailants, assuming that would be assailant is Elmer Fud. Simply duck down a corner, flip your clothes inside out, and pray they ain’t thirsty.

This week the Poles saw the silhouette of Pope John Paul II in a bonfire while celebrating their hometown hero but was this really a miracle or a foreboding display of fire and brimstone. Besides being much more devilish than the famous Mother Teresa appearance on cinnamon bun (pictured right), the silhouette while accurate is also very dubious. Are we supposed to believe John Paul is still hunching over in

This week Youtube launched its automated video ID system in an effort to filter copyrighted content. And it’s a dud. The system relies on content owners submitting full copies of their content as a reference, which opponents argue is unnecessary and unfairly places the burden on them. Moreover, the system is hit and miss. It depends on an accurate duplication and cannot take into account things such as re-encoding. This

Remember those old spy movies where the sexy agent whips out her makeup compact and blows on it to reveal the deadly laser beams? American soldiers do it one better. They’ve come up with a new use for silly string–IED detection. Soldiers are spraying the Iraqs silly to spot the trip wires of IEDs. And God bless their innovation but just who was the Private MacGyver that pioneered (read: stumbled

In the seemingly prophetic Simpsons episode G.I. D’oh (video right) recruiters shamelessly push Army propaganda on school kids offering them the chance to pre-enlist. Sure we all laughed, but who’s laughing now? On October 15th, Chicago commissioned the nation’s 1st public high school run by the U.S. Marine Corps. And while students are under no obligation to go to the Iraqs and such, they are required to wear a military