In Amazing Spider-Man #685, he teams up with Silver Sable to stop Doctor Octopus from launching rockets that will supposedly fix the ozone (see: Spider-Man VS Al Gore). When Silver Sable blows up the factory, Spider-man chastises her but then proceeds to literally rip the Rhino a new one. “I said ‘no one dies’…” Spidey tells his teammate. “…didn’t say we couldn’t mess ‘em up.”

Things get even darker when they interrogate Sandman for the next location. Silver Sable pours acid on Sandman but he’s sure Spidey is too much of a boy scout to let her kill him. “I think six billion lives are on the line! And if I have to waterboard you–” Spider-Man yells. “–or acidboard you to save them– I’ll do it! Don’t think I won’t!” Sandman doesn’t call his bluff, which it was (for now at least). “I have changed. But not that much,” Spider-Man thinks. “Not Yet.”

Spidey’s hunch turns out to be right. The rockets are really designed to destroy the ozone, but they get to the next base too late to stop the launch. The lesson seems to be torture works, you just have to use it more and faster to get fresh intel. Uncle Ben must be rolling over in his grave.

Spider-Man Waterboards Sandman is a post from: L7 World

Affectionately known as the boob window, it’s been the source of many jokes over the years. To the point where Power Girl herself was forced to address it.

In JSA: Classified #2, Power Girl tells Superman:

People always ask me why I have this hole right here. They think I’m showing off… or just being lewd. But the first time I made this costume, I wanted to have a symbol like you. I just… I couldn’t think of anything. I thought, eventually, I’d figure it out. And close the hole. But I haven’t.

Power Girl debuts a new costume sans boob window in World’s Finest #1, but it’s not the first time she has covered up. Power Girl got downright uppity after DC Comics hired its first female publisher, Jenette Kahn. In All-Star Comics #64 the boob window was closed but without a symbol. This newly empowered girl accused Star Spangled Kid of being a “little chauvinist piglet” for suggesting she use a “Superman emblem with a P instead of an S!”

Writer Gerry Conway told Alter Ego:

Actually, closing the circle on Power Girl’s costume was [publisher] Jenette Kahn’s idea. She felt it was sexist, and she was probably right. I doubt Wally would have had such qualms, given his taste for ill-clad buxom babes. (A taste I share, by the way, and another reason why this former Catholic boy will probably burn in hell.)

All hope is not lost. Despite her outward appearance, Power Girl is still very sexual. She tells Huntress that she do whatever it takes to get home. “Even if I have to break seven of the ten commandments to do it,” she declares. That apparently includes sleeping with Mr. Terrific for parts to power her portal (pun intended).

There’s still plenty of fanservice too. Before donning her new costume Power Girl’s civilian clothes are torn to shreds. Huntress suggests she will be arrested for indecent exposure to which PG replies, “Prude.” The cover for World’s Finest #2 (pictured left) even features DC Universe’s first donkey punch! Power Girl is on all fours while the Irradiated Man blasts her in the back of the head. The previous issue ended with the villain asking, “Did you not like my touch, woman?”

The real victim in all of this is cosplay, which was basically invented for characters like Power Girl. These girls will grow up expecting you to look them in the eye!

Power Girl Busted by Fashion Police is a post from: L7 World

Current record Avengers: 3 – X-Men: 0

In Avengers Vs. X-Men: Versus #1, Namor (king of the oceans) loses to the Thing (who breathes air) in the water!!! He’s defeated by being pinned to the ground!? Meanwhile, Magneto (the master of magnetism) loses to Iron Man. Granted Tony switches to a non-metallic suit but Magneto can control all the any metal including the iron in your blood! Instead, they slug it out until Magneto senses the destruction of a planet by the coming Phoenix. He gives up because the fight is inconsequential in the scheme of things.

Uncanny X-Men #11, Red Hulk defeats Juggernaut-Colossus (two powerhouses in one) when Piotr gets worried about destroying his home and depowers to plain old Colossus. WTF! He could have just knocked the Hulk to a safe distance. Imagine if Superman gave up every time a super villain attacked Metropolis.

Upcoming bouts:

In Uncanny X-Men #12, Namor and Thing have a rematch. Based on the cover it appears to be on land, which would seem to put Namor at an even greater disadvantage but I wouldn’t be surprised if they “let” him win this time and call it even.

In Avengers Vs. X-Men: Versus #2, Captain America is matched up with Gambit. There’s no way the leader of the Avengers is going to lose. The second match is a gimme. Spider-Man is matched up with Juggernaut-Colossus!? (nuff said) It seems like the only Avengers who will get beaten are new members and even than they’ll have to be severely outmatched. It just goes to show you that mutants really are feared and hated.

Fixed Fights is a post from: L7 World

FF #17 opens with Peter making mental to do lists. One list for Peter Parker. One list for Spider-Man. And one list for Peter Parker & Spider-Man, which has one item: “Kick out Johnny Storm.”

Johnny’s antics causes “kick” to become “kill” and eventually “#^&$@&!!.” He turns the closet into a portal to the Negative Zone, calls Peter at work to ask him to bring home drinks, and throws a wild party with superpowered aliens, which actually turns out to be fun. Peter reconsiders letting Johnny stay until he opens the bathroom door and finds Annihilus, Lord of the Negative Zone, taking a dump.

Party Pooper is a post from: L7 World

In the latest story arc “Hulk Vs. Banner” the Hulk makes a deal with Doctor Doom to separate the pair but while Hulk finally finds peace, Banner goes mad. Banner believes that his greatness has been stolen from him. He becomes obsessed with recreating the Hulk, but the gamma radiation just give him a brain tumor so he decides to do the next best thing. He creates an island of hulks like something out of Doctor Moreau. Unfortunately, that makes him a target for a group of mad scientist hunters, who recruit the Hulk to kill Banner. Hulk reluctantly succeeds in The Incredible Hulk #7, and Banner is vaporized by his own gamma bomb. Not surprisingly, we haven’t seen the last of Banner. He is apparently reabsorbed into the Hulk and symbolically appears in a reflection screaming to get out.

To survive Hulk must “Stay Angry” in the upcoming story arc, which is 5 issues of pure adrenaline. “Imagine if you took the ‘Crank’ movies and put the Hulk in them and every five minutes, cut a segment out of them. … That’s what this is,” explains writer Jason Aaron. “I’m trying to make this the most frenetic and crazy thing I’ve ever written, just barreling ahead 90 miles per hour.”

The Hulk will take on She-Hulk, Punisher, Wolverine, Kraven the Hunter, Mexican drug dealers, Atlantean mobsters, Russian super soldiers, and bigfoots (plural).

“I think you can put Hulk in a traditional super hero setting, but I like the stories where he’s outside those boundaries. In this arc I get to do that with each issue. These are not throwaway one shots. This is act two of my bigger story,” said Aaron.

Hulk Smash Banner is a post from: L7 World

“Marvel ReEvolution seamlessly brings the worlds of print and digital media together for a comics experience like no other,” touts a Marvel press release. “The first two elements of this exciting new initiative were revealed as Marvel Infinite Comics, a new comic book format, and Marvel AR, the first major augmented reality app from a comics company.”

Infinite Comics debuted with a digital prologue for Avengers Vs. X-Men #1. It features Nova, who is desperately trying to out run the Phoenix Force in order to warn Earth. The story is free with either the print or digital version of the comic and also available for separate purchase at Marvel store for 99 cents.

Infinite Comics are specifically designed to be read digitally as many panels play off the previous panel in a flip book fashion. The inspiration was French artist Yves Bigeral and his digital comic “about DIGITAL COMICS” which was itself inspired by comic theorist Scott McCloud’s “infinite canvas” concept. The unifying theory between all of them is that comics are about creating time with space. Infinite Comics accomplishes this with progressive word balloons & captions, unfolding panels, and shifting focus while maintaining the static moments that are the staples of comics.

“The great thing about Infinite Comics is that even the writer gets to play with the medium in ways they never have before,” explains Chief Creative Officer Joe Quesada. “Not only can the artist guide the reader through the story, but the writer now has control of not only the pacing of the visuals, but the pacing of their narrative. It used to be that the only tools a writer had to pace their narrative in a standard comic was the placement of their balloons and caption boxes, the number and sequence of panels and the turn of the page. Now in an Infinite Comic, they control the caption boxes and how they’re delivered to the reader. It’s pretty damn sweet.

“One of the other cool things about the Infinite Comics technique is that it’s going to allow us to tell different genres of story in a much more effective fashion. For example, I’ve always found that horror never really quite translates to comics like it does in movies, and it’s incredibly difficult get that visceral moment of shock that all great horror movies do so well. The reason for this is the reader’s ability to control the timing and rhythm of a scene with the turn of the page as opposed to the control a director of a movie has over their audience. With an Infinite Comic, while you control the timing of the panels and captions, you don’t know what the next panel or caption is going to be. This allows storytellers scare as well as shock and surprise us in ways we’ve previously not been able to do in comics. So there are little things like that that I think creators will be experimenting with as we move forward.”

Print comics will also be startling readers thanks to augmented reality (AR) that literally makes the pictures jump off the page. The Marvel AR app, which can be downloaded for free on smartphones and tablets, unlocks exclusive extras that play over the print. It’s mostly behind the scenes content and previews but it’s not hard to imagine more interactive uses like simulating X-ray vision, showing speedsters in two places at once or even decoding those intentionally unreadable whispers between characters.

“Marvel AR is a perfect example of how digital innovation not only gives added value to print comics, but also brings a delivers an entirely new reading experience,” explained Peter Phillips, Senior Vice President/General Manager, Marvel Digital Media. “Now fans will have access to more behind-the-scenes material from their favorite Marvel products than ever before—and it’s all absolutely free.”

The ReEvolution will be Digitized is a post from: L7 World

Garfield Logan became the shape-shifting Beast Boy after he was bitten by a green monkey. It turned him green as well as all the animals he transformed into. His green skin landed him a role as alien on the television series Space Trek: 2020.

The new Beast Boy is on the run but not from paparazzi. He escapes from a super villain boot camp in the upcoming title: The Ravagers. Writer Howard Mackie says the motivation behind color changed is related to Animal Man, who gets his powers from the source of life known as “The Red.”

It’s Not Easy Being Green is a post from: L7 World

Iron Muslim is defeated not by the American military but by American culture. Stark realizes that being public enemy number one means he will never be able to enjoy things like Starbucks coffee, Apple products, or the Big Bang Theory box set. He devises a plan to endear himself to the public by producing a propaganda film that glorifies his actions. The movie stars Robert Downey Jr. as the lovable rogue, who redirects an alien spaceship from crashing into Manhattan and into Lady Liberty instead. It does so well that Iron Muslim is recruited to be a real hero as part of a super hero team known as the Avengefuls.

Upcoming books:

Rich Johnston’s ScienTHORlogy
Rich Johnston’s Captain American Idol
Rich Johnston’s The Avengefuls

Iron Muslim is a post from: L7 World

Spider-Man VS Al Gore is a post from: L7 World

Spoilers

The story opens with Michonne racing home from work while still dressed in a skirt and high heels. The zombie outbreak has already claimed everyone she knows, save for her boyfriend, Mike, and his best friend, Terry, and even they become infected with the virus. When Michonne realizes the zombies don’t attack each other, she chops off their arms & jaws and puts them on a leash to escort her past the zombie horde.

What’s really shocking is that the iconic katana she uses throughout the series was part of her creepy neighbor’s samurai sword collection. It’s sorta like finding out Excalibur is just a prop from a renaissance faire.

Michonne’s Origin Uncovered in Playboy is a post from: L7 World