Obamacare offers hosurance to promiscuous women
Less than 50,000 people have enrolled for health care through the Obamacare website, far short of its 500,000 goal. Those who did sign up are presumably sick and elderly so to subsidize them the government is appealing to the young and healthy with beer and sex!

The Colorado Consumer Health Initiative (CCHI) and ProgressNow Colorado Education have created a viral website called Got Insurance that features provocative ads targeting various groups like bros and hos. Brosurance lets guys act like frat boys without having to worry about medical bills eating into their beer money. Hosurance lets women have promiscuous sex without worrying about getting pregnant because birth control is free under Obamacare. The salacious ads feature women drooling over a life-size cardboard cutout of Ryan Gosling but now they can literally afford not to be picky about who they sleep with.

“Let’s hope he’s as easy to get as this birth control,” says Susie about a slightly less cut man. “My health insurance covers the pill, which means all I have to worry about is getting him between the covers.”

Jen Caltrider of ProgressNow explains, “I watch a lot of football, so I’m not really surprised keg stands and red solo cups are the way to reach 20-something guys. Those guys signing up for insurance is only half the equation. We need to reach 20-something women, as well, and we hope this round of ads will do that.”

Prostitutes celebrate Obamacare

obamacare got insurance Ryan Gosling