Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher break up on Two and a Half Men (Ashton Kutcher and Jon Cryer)

Real-life couple Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis part ways on this week’s Two and a Half Men (“Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang”). Billionaire Walden Schmidt (Kutcher) falls for a free spirited hitchhiker named Vivian (Kunis) after that 70s show… Muade. The actors reference not only their careers but also their relationship. Walden insists he’d never date an actress because they’re all crazy; and Vivian doesn’t get the obsession over the personal lives of celebrities.

“Who cares who’s dating whom or who’s engaged to who or who has a sex tape that no one will ever, ever see,” Vivian says to a very receptive male audience who are no doubt scouring the internet for ‘Mila Kunis sex tape.’

Walden offers to take her anywhere she wants to go and imagines them sailing around the world with a stowaway, his unwanted house guest Alan Harper (Jon Cryer). Vivian explains that for her it’s the journey that’s important not the destination so they decide to go their separate ways for now.

Mila Kunis guest stars on Two and a Half Men (Ashton Kutcher and Brooke D'Orsay lesbian threesome dream)

Even though Walden doesn’t hookup, his groin sees a lot of action. First, his current girlfriend Kate (Brooke D’Orsay) kicks him for dumping her, then Vivian kicks him for sneaking up on her in the woods. He dreams of both girls fawning over him while recovering from his injury. They offer to kiss him but Walden suggests they make out with each other instead.

Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher break up on Two and a Half Men (Ashton Kutcher, Jon Cryer and Clark Duke gay kiss)

Unfortunately, the sexy dream sequence is interrupted by reality. Alan and Barry (Clark Duke) overhear Walden talking in his sleep and assume he wants them to kiss. Fortunately, that gay kiss is interrupted by the credits.